Top 10 Polite Habits Most People Secretly Dislike:Of course, it’s easy to mess up when it comes to being nice and following the rules of etiquette. A lot of rules about how to behave have changed in just the last ten years.
\There are also times when the things you try to do because you think they are nice can backfire. For many of these, the problem comes up because you know the other way is rude and then fix it too much.
Top 10 Polite Habits Most People Secretly Dislike
You just need to find the middle ground. a manners expert, can help you do that.
Being polite isn’t about following complicated rules. Instead, it’s about being kind and respectful, working together, and putting others first—sometimes even yourself” in every scenario.
the person is much more important than the polite habit. This will help you figure out what to do if you ask yourself, “Is this kind or helpful?” instead of “Is this polite?”
Cheek kissing or hugging hello
- Before the pandemic, people often got personal when they said hello.
- They would kiss someone on the cheek, kiss the air by their ear, hug them, and grab their arm.
- But many people didn’t like these “polite” greetings getting in the way of their personal space even before they were worried about sharing an infectious disease.
Leaving detailed voicemails
- A twenty-year-ago voicemail was everything because, well, it was everything.
- You could only leave a message or write the person from your (not portable) desktop computer to let them know why you called.
- At that time, it was polite to leave a detailed message that often repeated information so that people could get all the information they needed before calling you back.
Automatically saying “yes”
- Grotts says that when someone asks them to do something, “polite” or “kind” people say “yes” right away because they think they can change their minds later.
- However, she says that this is not a nice thing to do unless you are sure you can keep your promise.
- It might make the person asking feel good at the time.
- This can make both of you angry, frustrated, and hurt, and it can make you feel like you have too many things to do and are too busy.
Replying “thanks” to a group email
- You might think that going “reply all” to an email with a lot of people on it is the nice thing to do to keep everyone up to date.
- Most people get a lot of emails every day, so “reply all” should only be used for important notes that everyone needs to see.
- “When people just reply ‘thanks’ to the whole group is the biggest peeve.”
- Too many letters that don’t add anything will be sent if everyone does that. Also, it’s really hard to find the information you need because you have to scroll through all the comments to find an earlier piece of information.
Tagging people on social media
- It’s normal to tag family, friends, and even coworkers on social media these days.
- At first, it might seem like the right thing to do—after all, they want to see the pictures and be a part of them, right? Not so much.
- different people have different levels of comfort with their privacy and online presence, and some people might not like you putting up a digital “you are here” flag.
- Not only do people not want to be tagged because they value privacy, but they may also not want to offend others, stay away from scams, or dislike being told what others think.
Saying “no worries”
- “thank you” and expressing thanks are both polite things to do, as long as you use positive language. When someone thanks you, many people say “no worries,” “no big deal,” or “no problem.”
- These responses aren’t rude, but they can make the other person feel bad.
- “These phrases imply that they were bothering you or that you thought their request was a bother.
Apologizing for every little thing
- The nicest thing you can do if you trip someone up or mess up at work is to say sorry right away (sincere apology).
- But some people often say sorry for small mistakes (“I’m so sorry I loaded the dishwasher wrong”) or for things they aren’t responsible for (“I’m so sorry the weather is so bad today!”), or they say sorry over and over again.
- People will not only get annoyed by this, but they’ll also worry that they’re doing something to make you feel bad all the time. They feel bad because of that.
Showing up early
- You know that showing up late to a party is rude and not a good idea, so you might decide to get there early just to be safe.
- What if you offer to help when you get there? You might as well be the guest of honor, right?
- This “polite” attitude seems to bother hosts a lot. You were told to come at 6 p.m., so it’s likely that they aren’t ready for people to come before then.
Showering someone with compliments
- It can be hard to give compliments. At first glance, they might look like the most polite people in the world.
- But they might not come across the way you meant them to. When people are complimented on their looks, it can make them feel awkward or even like an object.
- When you tell someone they look great and must have lost weight, you may be saying they look nice, but they might feel bad because they didn’t look great before they lost weight.
- No matter how well you mean what you say, being too straight can be annoying.
- It’s funny to compliment yourself and to make fun of yourself at the same time. It can be tempting to play down praises because they can make you feel awkward.
- in response to a praise makes you look like a braggart. I’m so smart!”
- When someone tells you that you look great today, you might want to say, “Really?”
- I got out of bed just now!” But reactions like this that make fun of yourself can make the person who complimented you feel bad. It sounds like you’re telling them they’re wrong.
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